2012 Re-cap

Hello Everyone,
I know that I have been lagging on my blog postings and I would like to say my bad and that I don't have any excuse for it.  My goal for 2013 is to be much better at making sure that I blog more.

Here is my 2012 re-cap for anyone who is interested:

2012 started off amazing..I was in Australia and I brought New Year in down under.  I was surrounded by amazing people so that helped.  The rest of the month was cool as I turned 42 and I had my week long birthday celebration like I do every year.  I celebrate my birthday every year, because were I grew up there were plenty of guys that didn't make it and I'm one of the lucky ones along with my boy Big D who made it.  I don't remember exactly what I did during my week long birthday celebration..lol but I'm sure I had a blast :-)

During the spring time I was back in Australia during April.  I had a blast once again.  The Ballers also played in 2 tournaments.  We didn't win as many games as I would like, but we grew as a team, which was very important to me.  The rest of the spring was spent trying to get my Baller players ready for the  big July tournaments.

The Summer came and I went to Australia again for my last basketball camp of 2012 and it went well, expect for my last day of camp at M'Dor.. that was very painful..lol.  It rained the first 4 days of my June Australia trip.  That wasn't fun at all.  I almost came home early, but I decided to stay and keep my original flight.  I also had shoulder surgery on June 1st and that made my travel to Australia and the whole month of June very painful, because I had my shoulder in a sling for the whole month.  I also had this idiot, hit my shoulder at the girls dance recital.  I would have given him a beat down, but I was in so much pain.  I returned home on July 3rd, to get my boys ready for the July swing of tournaments. We played well and hard, but we had our ups and downs, but I was very happy with the effort we showed win or lost during our July tournament.  The Ballers had 3 great kids come and play with us from Australia and it was such a joy to have James Griffin, Jules DeCourtnay and Ryley Warmer be apart of the Baller family and I hope that their time here with the Ballers was beneficial for them as much as it was for us.

I had some highs and lows during the year and if you're alive and breathing that is to be expected.  My lows left me in a funk and depressed and I had no one to blame, but myself.  I've struggled for years with a few different things and this past year those things hit me hard.  I know being happy is up to me and me alone and the times I was happy, when I allowed myself to be that way.  I learned a lot about myself in 2012 and those things were both good and bad.  Looking within can be very hard, because you may not like what you find.  There were more lows, but I won't bore you with all of them.  My highs were my children.  They are my world and I probably won't be on this earth, if they weren't here. I would have easily let life get the best of me, if it were not for them.  I learned that its ok for me to be happy and that was a lesson that was hard to learn and I'm most truly a work in progress with that.  I tried to make sure that I gave everything I had to my Baller players to make sure that they had the best chance of reaching their dreams, whatever the were.  I also lost a dear friend to cancer this year, which is so very sad.  She left behind 3 kids and 2 grandkids.

You may ask, why do a blog, why let the world know your thoughts and my answer to that would be..why to people write poetry or books and novels based on true facts.  It serves as therapy for some and for the others...I couldn't begin to explain why the open themselves up to the world.  I know I tend to be open just enough to the world, but I also keep them at arms length.  There are only a select few that I could and would bare my soul to.  I'm only a complete open book them.  I can honestly say that at times my lows almost got the best of me and there were times that those lows got the best of me and left my paralyzed and thinking there wasn't any hope.  So my goals and I only make goals and not resolutions for 2013 is to have a ton more highs than lows and to chase my dreams even harder.  I won't Nike to pick up my Australian program, which is running camps and tournaments in Australia.  I would back and forth, help kids from Australia come over and play high school and college basketball in U.S. I want to pursue a career in Sport Psychology and to be in a much better position financially, because I have way too much education not be making a lot more money.  I won't to make more money to provide for myself and of course my kids more.  I'm going to work even harder and get leaner, so I can get of this medication for type 2 diabetes.  I'm going to get several tattoos, just because I need that for me and if you don't have any ink, than you couldn't possibly understand what I'm feeling and why I need some more ink.  "Only a fool confuses fate with destiny, fate is what happens to us, destiny is what we make in spite of our fate"  This quote may end up being a tattoo some day..lol   I know I'm a good man with good intentions with a big heart and when I love you I love big, hard and deeply, but they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions..lol  I'm a flawed man on my best day.  I make mistakes daily and there are times when I make those mistakes twice in the same day.  That makes me human and I learned a long time ago after going to counseling that perfection isn't good and you tend to make more mistakes when trying to be perfect.  I no longer to be perfect, I just try to be me the best I can and sometimes that means I'm sweet and super nice and other times I'm a S.O.B.  lol  Some of you may read this and say he didn't say a damn thing and others will notice how much I opened up and truly understand what I'm saying.  I truly don't like conflict and arguing is such a waste of time and my goal is to not let those things happen as much as they did in 2012.  My 43rd birthday is 19 days away and I plan on having a kick ass week long birthday again this year and I will take notes this time so when I blog on 12.31.2013 I can give a better recap then I did this time :-)

Well I think I need to end this novel here and get ready to fall asleep before the New Year comes, because that is what I tend to do most years...lol  In closing I would like to thank you for taking the time to ready my blog.  I almost forgot, to mention that I have rediscovered my baking jones and I have been  baking up a storm in 2012 and I plan on baking more in 2013, because I have sharpen my skills and my baking is becoming kick ass and I want it get my skills even better.  I've finally gotten my frosting skills to my liking :-)

Take Care and may Allah bless you  in 2013

Big Nellie